Have you ever read the poem that ends with this… “He whispered, ‘My precious child, I love you and will never leave you; never, ever, during your trials and testings. When you saw only one set of foot-prints, it was then that I carried you.’”?
I don’t exactly remember the first time I read or heard this, but I do know that when I was made aware of it I thought to myself that it sure was a comforting thought, in a figurative way. I never really thought about it in a literal sense, at least not until after losing my daughter.
The night our precious Mabry Kate passed away, we had ridden the ambulance to our local children’s ER. We entered and exited the same ER entrance. We entered with our daughter and exited with empty arms, broken hearts, and shattered dreams of the future we had planned for her.
But how? How in the world did we manage to gather ourselves enough to exit the hospital empty handed? How could we put one foot in front of the other? How could we muster up the strength to get in a car without her? How could we even breathe?
As I’m six years out from losing her, I can’t help but take a step back and ponder those recollections. It blows my mind, really. All the “how” questions flood my thoughts. The first few times I recalled that night, I didn’t have answers. Then, one day it hit me…
We couldn’t gather ourselves and exit alone. We couldn’t put one step in front of the other. We couldn’t muster up the strength to get in the car. We couldn’t breathe. But Jesus could and did and does all those things for us. It was then that He carried us. It was then that He wrapped his loving arms around us. It was then that He breathed for us. He alone was our strength and our comfort in that moment and has continued to be as we wake up and put one foot in front of the other without her physical presence.
As I reflect on this in our lives, I begin to see it in the lives of others we know and love. I was reminded that Jesus also carries them and you through every battle, including those with leukodystrophies. I have heard brave and broken-hearted stories of other beloved children’s “diagnostic odysseys” and hospitalizations and passings. I have heard parents struggles, cries, and heartaches.
BUT…I have also heard laughter! I’ve heard heartwarming and funny stories. I’ve seen love come from these families — which is exactly what Jesus is. He is love and He carries us all.
I hope that you know that you cannot face your trials and hardships alone. You can rest in the loving arms of Jesus Christ. I hope you see that Jesus never leaves nor forsakes you, and that He has and will continue to carry you through the times you don’t think you can survive. He will. That’s the ultimate comfort.
~ Christin Webb
Mother of Mabry Kate (3/13/14 – 2/7/15) and Owen (3/30/15)
We come to You with awe and thanksgiving of the comfort you pro-vide to us in our trials and struggles. The comfort you offer our hearts is unmatched. Thank You for holding us when our world is crashing in, when we feel our hearts are shattered beyond all repair, and when we feel we cannot take another breath or another step. Help us to remember in the times we feel we are alone in our heart-ache, You are there.
I pray that You will comfort those reading and praying these words each and every moment of every day, even on the days when going through the motions seems like the only option.
We love you, and even in our confusion, anger, sadness, or whatever phase of life we are in, we trust You and Your sovereignty.
Help us to lean not on our own understanding.
Thank You for going before us and making a way to spend eternity with You and with our loved ones.
It’s in Your precious and holy name we pray,
So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
For I am the Lord your God
who takes hold of your right hand
and says to you, “Do not fear;
I will help you.”