I hate when I feel as though I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop.
I always feel that something terrible is lurking around the corner of my life.
It threatens to disrupt everything.
It longs to steal my comfort.
With much arrogance I cry out, “Haven’t I gone through enough?
Haven’t I already experienced enough pain and despair in this life?”
Oh God, look what fear has done to me.
I’ve become a slave to my idea of what this life should be like.
I’ve allowed my broken heart and frayed edges to confuse me.
Forgive me, Father.
I hate when life starts to unravel and I reach for worldly remedies that will never satisfy.
Please fix my broken thinking.
I’m hurting.
You are the only one that can captivate my affections.
And You are not holding out on me.
You have given me everything I could ever need or want for life and godliness.
You have given me Jesus!
Keep the innermost core of who I am vigilant and steadfast.
I want to be able to say, as Job did, “Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him” (Job 13:15).
Help me to live in the moment and enjoy the gift of the present.
It’s all I’ve been given, and I long to honor You with it.